LMAO, that's a good point about hashing Fanny's squee. I tend to get hyper-sensitive about religious stuff, so to me it felt a lot more like pearl-clutching than "...well there goes my fun times".

I just really like Mary, in part. She reminds me of Emma with her liveliness and wit and benign selfishness.

I don't think Maria was uncomfortable with Henry flirting with her -- I think she was uncomfortable with the reminder that she's marrying Mr. Rushworth. She likes to think about her upcoming marriage when she's reminded of the wealth she'll gain, but otherwise she seems to prefer pretending that she's single and available for Henry.

For me, if Fanny and Edmund were real, I wouldn't feel happy with what they said in this chapter. Religious stuff, in particular the Christian stuff I was raised in, can have a very bad effect on me too. After I wrote my comment last night, I found it weird that I could detach myself from them, but Fanny works for me because she's at a remove from my time and place. I don't respond that way to all historical characters though.

I thought Henry was bothering her, because the mention of marriage and the way it happened gave him the opportunity to flirt with her about it. I think she's more comfortable - or was before chapter ten - when she thinks about how good her marriage is for her socially. It's all she's ever known to want, and now someone is waking up different feelings and possibilities. At this point, she hasn't yet really thought that Henry wants to marry her. If he hadn't flirted with her then or ever again, she would have taken it with some disappointment but not too badly, which is probably why he kept doing it. And I think it was the location that played a factor - she has Crawford feelings and Rushworth feelings. In Sotherton Court, the Rushworth feelings were supposed to be more powerful and keep her comfortable.

I definitely agree about Henry waking Maria to different possibilities in this chapter, and that this little exchange is when she starts to seriously want him instead of just having fun flirting with him. But I don't see him as the bother. Julia's the one who keeps bringing up her engagement to Mr. Rushworth and their impending marriage; Julia's the one who talks about it so much and so loudly as to catch Mr. Rushworth's attention and "expose her sister to the whispered gallantries of her lover..." and when they leave the chapel, Julia's the one Maria is unhappy with.

Julia is the one who unintentionally and unknowingly gives Henry the chance, but he is the one who takes it, so it's his fault, even if Maria only blames Julia. It makes sense to me that she would blame Julia, both because of her specific context (her problem is liking Henry too much and Julia being her rival) and because I think people in general prefer to blame women more than men (and in this kinds of situations in general), but I don't think that means Henry isn't the bother. I think this particularly because barouche!Maria was happy to be reminded of her importance as a soon-to-be wife to Mr. Rushworth. It happening again wouldn't have made her unhappy if Henry had left her alone.